A Grand New Experiment: Helping You Destroy Your Financial DadBod

In the first post on this blog, I defined a DadBod as “an area of one’s life that has gradually atrophied due to inattention and is now vaguely shitty and uninspiring.” Many people incorrectly assume this only applies to their physical fitness. But the truth is DadBods come in dozens of different flavors. One of the most common, and most dastardly, is a Financial DadBod.  

Financial DadBods are everywhere because personal finance often combines several things that many of us despise: spreadsheets, paperwork, feeling bad about ourselves, math, and fighting with our significant others. The longer we go without getting our financial house in order, the guiltier we feel about being “not good with money”.   

If any of that sounds familiar, I have a solution for you: Let’s do a Personal Finance Audit.


Like any good sales pitch, I’m going to start with a long list of who should absolutely NOT consider working with me:

  • You’re facing a financial emergency e.g. you can’t cover your fixed expenses, you have multiple past due bills, etc. These are serious situations and I don’t have the expertise to provide wise council.

  • You want someone to manage your investments. I’m not a registered investment advisor and I don’t know which cryptocurrency will outlive all the rest (neither does anyone else, btw.)

  • You feel uncomfortable sharing details about your income or your spending. This is completely understandable and many people feel this way. But like any audit, to be effective we need to pore over the books in detail.

  • You’re kind of a stick in the mud. Even for people who love it, some personal finance topics can get a little dry. Not taking yourself too seriously is a prerequisite for success.

  • You’re defensive about your spending. I couldn’t care less if you decide to spend 50% of your take-home pay on imported eye cream and bespoke driving gloves. But I will be honest and direct if it’s clear that you can’t afford it without making other big changes.

  • You graduated from Ohio State University (no explanation necessary).

  • You’re unwilling to change your future spending. Mindful spending is the name of the game and if you aren’t willing to call out mindless spending and take action to change it, this will be a giant waste of your time.



Besides the opposite of everything above, what type of person will find this valuable?:

  • You’re motivated to improve your finances but feel overwhelmed and don’t know where to start.

  • You don’t have any screaming financial emergencies, but you know you could be smarter with your money, and you recognize you are probably wasting some of it.

  • You’re excited about the prospect of understanding exactly where your money is going.

  • You’ve never done a deep dive into your spending or your beliefs about money.

  • You want to improve your relationship with money and develop better personal finance habits.

 

If that sounds like you, let me answer a few potential questions:

  • Why call it “Personal Finance Audit” instead of something more appealing like “Personal Finance Root Canal” or “Personal Finance Colonoscopy while Riding a Teeter-Totter”?

    • Because there’s no use in sugar-coating: part of it is going to be painful! But it’s short-term, temporary pain for priceless, durable peace of mind.

  • How are you qualified to do this? Do you have a CPA or a finance degree?

    • No and no! But I do have a preternatural talent and a deep abiding love for bringing order to chaos. That plus a 10-year obsession with personal finance.

  • What does the process look like?

    • I promise to be non-judgmental, patient, and honest. You promise to be courageous, open-minded, and committed.

    • Step #1: Facing Reality. We uncover the beliefs that determine your behavior with money. How are you actually spending your money? What makes up your Joy Index?

    • Step #2: Putting Out the Fires. We set our sights on the juiciest opportunities. Where are you over-spending? Where are you under-spending? Does your spending match your values?

    • Step #3. Building your Financial Future. We obliterate mindless spending and financial complexity. How does money flow through your life? What system will work for you?

  • What is the time commitment?

    • After an initial conversation to decide if you want to proceed, it will be 1-2 hours of homework and then 3 90-minute sessions.

  • How much does it cost?

    • Because this is still in the “Grand Experiment” phase, the only cost for now is a promise to provide me with direct, candid feedback once we’re done.

  • How do I get in touch to schedule an initial conversation over coffee?

Jesse Wilson1 Comment