I'm the Creeper in Your Neighborhood
About five years ago, I decided to walk every street in my hometown. I was born and raised in Ann Arbor, Michigan, went to college here, started a family here after finishing school, and I have no plans to leave. Having spent essentially my entire life within a four mile radius, it felt strange that there were still entire neighborhoods in town that were completely foreign to me. So I slapped a 3.5 x 5 foot laminated map up on our office wall and began venturing forth into the suburban wilderness, one unchartered Cul-de-sac at a time.
Fret not, ye intrepid neighborhood watch captains: Although I appear to be canvassing targets for breaking and entering, I bear you no ill will.
When I tell people about my quest, I generally get one of two follow-up questions:
#1. How long will it take you?
#2. Why are you doing that? (Followed almost certainly by an inner monologue of “If only I had the free time to spend…”)
The first question is easy: Based on my pace so far, I should be done between 2021 and 2023.
The second question is tougher once I get past the surface level “I just thought it was weird that after 35 years in one place, I could still get lost.” Over time, I’ve realized that the best answer is “Because it’s a good hobby and I’ve learned it’s important for human beings to have good hobbies.”
A list of worthwhile hobbies would fill an old-timey medieval scroll but the very best have a few characteristics in common:
Restorative at least, invigorating at best. An ideal hobby energizes you to perform less exciting, but still required work. At a minimum, it should help you recharge and get back to your baseline level of energy and focus. When the weather cooperates and I’m riding a scintillating caffeine high, exploring a new part of town on foot has been my single best practice for generating blog post ideas. Even when it’s crummy out, it still helps settle my mind.
Provides connection. This can be connection to a community, to a certain place, even to a bygone time/era. Feeling connected is a pillar of wellness and a hobby is an opportunity to deepen and enhance your connections. Barring something unforeseen, I’ll live in Ann Arbor for the rest of my life and taking the time to get to know the city inside and out gives me a greater sense of where I’ve decided to put down roots.
It will also provide a killer attack line in my stump speech when I run for Mayor in 2032: “My friends, having lived here all my life, I couldn’t help but walk every square inch of this beautiful city from Vet’s Park to Gallup Park and from the Dhu Varren Woods to Briarwood. My opponent mixes up Nichols Arb with Nickels Arcade.”
Your skills improve with time. Because everyone is different, there isn’t a single “key” to happiness in life but I’m convinced that growth is an essential ingredient to fulfillment. Don’t fall for the myth that your job needs to be perfectly aligned with some all-encompassing, grand purpose for your life. But if it doesn’t provide clear feedback on your progress and evidence of your continued improvement, find a hobby that does. Pursuing this type of hobby fortifies the lesson that getting good at something leads to developing passion for it.
You may even find that your hobby helps develop unexpected skills that you can apply in other areas. My neighborhood walks have made me more observant and better at staying fully present in the moment.
Requires action. Choose a hobby that helps develop the habit of doing things. As simple as it sounds, taking action (versus planning to do something or talking about doing it) is often the most difficult step in making meaningful progress. Find a hobby that has a concrete output or product so you get practice doing what is necessary to achieve your desired result. You will savor the happiness of pursuit and it will reinforce the autonomy you have over your free time.
I don’t zoom in on new neighborhoods in Google Maps and click my way through them, I physically drive my ass there and conquer them on foot.
What if you have a hobby but it doesn’t fit the criteria above? Do you have to ditch it completely? No, but you should improve it by adding a few of these qualities.
For example, a large percentage of the country’s primary hobby is watching TV. If this is you, find an online forum that is dedicated to your favorite show and dive into the minutiae of why the director chose that camera angle for the climactic scene or argue with other superfans about what is coming next.
Write an essay about why you love the show or a particular character so much.
Read the book(s) that the show was based on.
Go to a convention where the actors will be present.
Visit the city or country where it was filmed.
Become an expert and start a YouTube channel where you debrief every new episode.
Bottom line, your free time should be spent consciously doing things that enrich your life in multiple ways. Don’t go on auto-pilot and let your time be consumed by vapid distractions. Destroy the Hobby DadBod that has taken root in your evenings and weekends with extreme prejudice.